Never dear, never.
One thing I’m proud of is my friends, especially my female friends. I’m glad I consciously decided to surround myself with a group of fast-paced women who are killing it in their little corners. My friends and I have deep conversations about a lot of things; the conversations are so deep and relatable that most times, I tell myself that I’m not willing to make new friends. Because building the strong connection I have with my female friends with new people is not something I’m open to.
Anyway, today, I don’t want to write about my female friends, I want to write about something I feel that everyone needs to know.
Wait, have you subscribed to my YouTube channel? I have a channel where I share tips on freelancing, making money online, and lifestyle. You should check it out here.
I noticed that a lot of us use social media as a tool to measure how miserable or how successful our lives are. You see your classmate living his or her “best life” on social media, and you think that’s how life is; it’s so good for others, and God has forgotten you. You see all your mates in “happy” relationships, and you are worried that cupid has taken your name off the records. Your mates live alone, and you still live with your parents or maybe a family member where you do so many chores that leave you wondering how they were even coping before you came.
See, people hardly show you the struggle. If you check my IG page, you’ll think I have it all figured, but who dash me figured out? I never posted when I stopped working at my great job in August and how I got 0 orders in August. Did I tell you that I got one job in September and one more in October? It was painful, and I used to cry every day because I was making around $1k or more per month from freelancing, and in the space of months, I couldn't even relate.
My rent was due; I just got accepted to something I wanted, but how could I pay for it? How could I pay for anything when I spent my savings and not making any substantial amount of money? It’s not like I wasn’t making any money, people can live comfortably on what I earned in September and October, but I was broke compared to my normal income. I cried every day, and I never posted it because people hardly ever post their bad days.
Freelancing is a risky business; I always heard that. I had never had problems with my finances. It paid me well, and remember, until August 2020, I also had a full-time job that I was combining with freelancing. I was not looking for money; a chunk of my money then went to living my best life and paying my black tax, lol. When I stopped working at my job, August to early November showed me that freelancing is a risky business, it will show you pepper, but you don't know that because everyone’s life is perfect on social media.
Things went back to normal in November, and my freelancing career took off again. I decided to share my story because some of us use social media as a standard of measurement. We feel bad when people are announcing their new jobs, new cars, new homes, relationships and weddings, kids, and other good things. Celebrate with people, but that should be about that. It’s not enough reason to cry and ask God when he’s going to give you what your friend or your neighbor has.
Only recently, one social media influencer whose salary structure for his members of staff posted something about young people making sure they get great deals on social media. This was someone I held in high esteem previously until I found out from someone who had an interview with his company that his salary structure is a horror tale. You see this person on social media, and you say, “God, when will you give me a job in this man’s company? I know he’s going to pay me well.” Lol, you will be disappointed, my dear.
Don’t even get me started with relationships. You don’t know what goes on behind closed doors. You guys, you need to be calming down this year. Stop making people whose lives you have no idea about make you feel like your growth is slow.
When I post something on my Facebook, I get comments like “you are doing so well.” It’s because that’s what I show you. You don’t know how hard I struggle or how unmotivated I am most times. I only show you when I seem to have my life all figured out, but do I?
Lose the term “God when” this year because if God tells you that now is the time to answer you, you might not like how it turns out. Imagine that you root for a relationship where you have no idea that one of the partners is cheating or is abusive. The relationship might seem so perfect on social media that you want that and start to ask God when. Do you want him to give you a cheating partner? Okay, you feel that I’m a badass in freelancing, and you want my life? Can you deal with almost three retrogressive months in my freelancing career?
You don’t know what goes on behind closed doors, so what you can do is be happy for others, and if you are genuinely tired of where you are now, set up a strategy that can work. After being tired of not getting many freelancing jobs on Upwork in 2 months, I changed my strategy, and it worked out for me from September to October. Oh, I shared that here. So, if you want a change, those who make you feel like you are not making progress are not the problem; the problem is that you are susceptible and not serious.
Do something if you want a change. Set up a realistic strategy and stick to it. You can start by planning your goals little by little instead of forcing yourself to do so much, and when it doesn’t work out for you, you start to worry and compare yourself with others who are “killing it.” Slow growth is growth too, my problem will be when you are not making any progress, then maybe you have something to worry about, but if you can see progress, no matter how small, that’s enough to keep you going.
You can also try to keep a gratitude journal. That way, you’ll become more grateful for how your life is going.
“Nothing is as it seems. Not a career, not a relationship, nothing! Don’t make anyone your goals; you don’t know what goes on behind closed doors. You are doing well.” – Chisimdi.
Yes, you are doing well. Slow growth is growth too.