I Think I Made Her Contract HIV

"I still live with the guilt today..."

I'm so glad to do this with you guys again. Thanks for all the support. This HIV and Human Trafficking series takes the major part or accounts for the major part of the views on my blog.

I am supposed to share a story on Human Trafficking today, but I'm sharing one on HIV because it's important for this guy to move on and forgive himself.

Gift Wogu is going to Benin Republic on Friday. I am definitely going to meet with some victims and draft strategies to help them. I have more stories on human trafficking, this series is here to stay.

To cut the long story short, this is one guilt I have lived with and still living with. 

I won't describe myself as a perfect person of course no one is perfect. Everyone has a secret, I think by expressing  mine to someone I'll feel much better and others can learn from my mistake.

I once dated this young lady she was beautiful and she had a child ( boy) out of wedlock.

I am a young entrepreneur and  I'm living fine.
I am the kind of guy that wants a woman who pushes me to go beyond my success, who wants me to be better than myself, I want a woman who is industrious.

But when I met her, the reverse was the case, I knew she had a child but I loved her like that. We basically and on most occasions had sex protected and unprotected.  Sex between us was okay and I was footing her bills and all. But my entrepreneurial spirit of spending wouldn't let me feel fine even though spending for her wasn't the problem because as at this time I had much.

As things went on, I became broke and wasn't spending on her as much as I was before.
On one occasion, I opened up to her that I can no longer spend on her as much as I do. I sat her down and advised her to get a job or something that can provide her money. So she can take care of her and the child. Little did I know I was pushing her into going into prostitution, she became scarce and for sometime I didn't see her again...

Sometime later, her mother called me that she was sick, I rushed down to see her only to observed she had a strange sickness. The last thing she told me was that she went to get money by any means since that was the last thing I told her to do.

Few weeks later she died.

I feel terribly guilty not because i couldn't have taken care of her when I was broke but because I wanted her to be a better version of herself.

Till today, I have adopted the son and have been footing all the boy's bills, he calls me Father.

Dear, it's not your fault at all, it really isn't . So, forgive yourself and move on. I find it honourable that you have decided to look after the little boy. That's really amazing, but there were other ways she could make a living. Prostitution shouldn't be her last resort. What do you think guys? Is he guilty? Should he blame himself?

This interview was conducted by Blez Inyang, the Convener and Peer Educator of BlezInyang Foundation. He is a Nigerian and he lives Cotonou, Benin Republic. The story is in no way fiction. His foundation creates awareness for HIV/ AIDS. He is an advocate for gender, HIV/AIDS and human trafficking.

Gift Wogu on the other hand is particularly interested in gender and human trafficking. She has published a novel on human trafficking which is available in print and on Okadabooks.


  1. Great read as always. He's not guilty and shouldn't blame himself. She probably would have done the same thing if he wasn't in the picture.

  2. Touching story. As much as he feels guilty, Its not his fault. Well it depends on how he advised her. Well May her soul rest in perfect peace. He's matured and kind hearted for taking her son and fending for him. He should forgive himself and sensitise young ladies and guys too about this kind of mistakes. Blaming himself won't bring her back. Taking it as a lesson and using the experience to help others is key. Nice one gift, keep up the good work��.

  3. He is in no way to be blamed for her misfortune. Thousands of people (females) go through hard times and they haven't resorted to prostitution. Whatever happened to skill acquisition? I'm sure he would have supported her if she wanted to do that. She chose her path. It's human to feel bad but don't blame yourself for her death dear.

  4. Wow... It's a beautiful thing you guys are doing .. .kudos

  5. Hard to take, but it isn't his fault.
    She could have taken another line, but made a grave mistake. Plus it is not your duty to provide for someone who isn't your spouse or child or parent .

    1. I hope he understands that. It's a good thing that he is doing for the child anyway.


Post a Comment

Popular Posts