Danfo Liar!

‘I no dey Lagos now o. I dey Badagry, I don almost enter Cotonu…’ I had to be sure the Danfo is headed to Surulere and not Benin Republic.


Hey blog readers, how have you all been? I have been really fine. I’m dealing with my writer’s block by watching tons of movies and reading tons of books.  It actually dawned on me that Imagenaija will be one next month and I haven’t made the most use of the blog and the domain name I paid for. I think I should have a writing schedule. Last week was a hell of a week with my very painful cramps that graduated to a full blown illness to my motherhood duties. I actually went for School run last week. It was fun, but I’d rather save all the fun till I have my own kids.  No rush in life abeg.

Today, I’m writing about Lagos Danfo people and the lies they tell. Wait, if you haven’t entered a Danfo bus, you are missing nothing. There is nothing mind blowing about it. Just a bunch of angry Lagosians stuck inside one rickety vehicle with a driver that cares more about money than he does about his own life.
Two weeks ago, I was on my way to Surulere. NYSC has this weird thing for people who are in Special CDS. We apparently have to bring a kind of clearance form from our CDS Leader before we can be allowed to do the monthly biometrics. I usually do not like talking about service, but the 2017 B are leaving and we have hope. Why not?

As I was saying, I was in this bus heading to Ojuelegba from Ikeja when I met this loud lying woman! I’m not judging, but what is cool about disturbing angry Nigerians about your breakup and lying that you are not in Lagos, you are in Badagry and you are almost at Cotonu? For real madam? Bus that was heading to Surulere o. I had to check if I’m in the right bus because I know Badagry and it is not close to Ojuelegba at all. We were so pissed. I felt like telling the lady to shut her trap, but you know, it’s a Danfo and it’s not my father’s car so I should enjoy my ride, right? Did I also forget to mention the lady who was sitting close to me? This one was making all of us listen to the poor comedy videos she was watching. Use an earpiece or wait till you get the hell home! Why do we have to know your taste in comedy? Why ma?

I sha cannot wait to buy my own car. What is the most horrible experience you’ve had in a commercial vehicle before? Meanwhile, I am currently watching CW’s series Jane The Virgin and I am asking myself why that series have been chilling in my system for some time now and I have refused to watch it. Petra is officially my favourite character as extreme niceness is a huge turn off for me. I’m also following How To Get Away With Murder season 5. What series do you guys think I should see?

Comments

  1. Try "everbodev hates Chris",its comedy,u'll love it 😁

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I have seen the movie. It's really old.

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  2. Hahahahahahaha. Wait till you hear "I'm inside the bank now! I just paid in your money!" Whilst you're seated in a Coaster bus headed for Main market. Even with the noise and shouting from drivers and conductors. Some people no get chill shaa.

    You could try 'Grownish' I've not watched it tho, but I heard its interesting.

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    Replies
    1. Lol, I just can't deal with the whole bus drama. I can't wait to buy a car. I'll check out the series, thanks.

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  3. Lol. People can lie. And the thing is they will be so confident doing it.

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  4. "I should have a writing schedule." I heard it works. Your audience would know when to expect/visit when they know how frequently you post. This also applies to search engines.

    Can I call it a "horrible experience"? ...when someone stretches/rests her hand behind my back and begins to rub her "clean" armpits or "whatever" on me.

    How loosely coupled some people can be in a public transport...

    Nice piece...

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    Replies
    1. Dear Zest, I will work on the writing schedule. With regards to the bus drama, it tires me too. I just have to get used to it till I buy my own car.

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  5. lovely. nice writing skills

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